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Thursday, December 1st, 2005
12:32 am - [Private]
I had to let go... before I couldn't anymore.
I had to induce hatred, because it's easier to deal with than love.

Hatred is something I understand and can handle...

At least I have something to look back on... and if I die tomorrow I regret nothing.

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Friday, November 25th, 2005
10:02 pm
We fight, we make up... only to fight again.
I hope we can break this cycle because truely I grow weary of it.

Maybe I have found a new hope... I feel enlightened for sure. Cleansed by the purity of the act that you were kind enough to show me... to perform with me.

Yet still the darkness looms, waiting to strike again as soon as I let down my guard, I have moved my place of residence, perhaps you should consider asking your mentor to move locations also.... especially if certain individuals find you are with him.

For now I will simply prepare and live one day at a time... turning my eyes from the past to a possible future.

current mood: contemplative

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Saturday, November 19th, 2005
11:58 am - [[Private]]
So much happening and half I'd rather not re-live by explaining too deeply....

Where to start.....

The past few weeks have been like a dream... a dream of what my life could have perhaps been like if things in my past had not occured.

Tragically all of us must wake from our dreams and my rude awakening came in the form of my brother. After Naruto like always... why should he worry about me after all.... I'm only his -weak- little brother. Yet still I convinced his friend? or whatever he was, Kisame, to take me too him. All of this at the price of leaving this village again, punching Shizune-san.... (why do I always leave after making some girl pass out?)

Well I won't go into details, needless to say I was dragged on a wild goose chase that included a dunk in a river and a trip to Suna before I had to cut myself on a kunai filled with Poison. Thankfully Shizune had seen fit to give me an antidote before I left.... I was atleast aware by the time I got to Itachi... and then we fought... after that I don't remember too much until he caught me with his eyes. After that..... after that was horrible...

When I came too Naruto was there, saved me again apparently... why? Why must he always get to play the hero? Why did I have to live yet again?

Whatever... I lived and it just means I have to work even harder... maybe I should leave this village permanently again. This village is too peaceful for me to ever get proper training....to peaceful for me to become stronger.

Tsunade has decided to not imprison me which was her first instinct... and she's helped me a little with some of the new problems my brother has left me with. Thank you for this brother... you've just given me another reason to hate you.

Naruto... heh... I'm not really sure what is going on with him. He claims to love me but............

current mood: discontent

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Wednesday, November 9th, 2005
12:21 pm - [[Private]]
So... I've been back in Konoha for awhile... things have progressed ... slowly.

A brief summary of events so far... met up with the Kazekage again, fought, had dinner, found out Naruto was -with- him at one point. So much strangeness happened while I was gone.

So now I'm allowed to go on missions with heavy supervision. Seems that even though I've done nothing suspicious since I've been back, I'm still under suspicion. Not surprising really.

I've been spending more and more time around Naruto lately though. It's nice having one person that doesn't suspect every single move I make, and he's a good connection to other people. Surprisingly the idiot has grown up a bit in the time I've been gone.

And not so surprisingly I think... that maybe he likes me... atleast that's what he said last night. I may have a headache from hell but I still remember it all. The first kiss was nice... the second kiss was better, the goodnight kiss was sweet. I might as well make the best of the time I have here... who knows when news of him will come in and it'll be time for me to leave....

current mood: contemplative

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Wednesday, May 25th, 2005
9:01 pm
Right. So Kabuto decided that he didn't like me at all and kicked me out of Otogakure without telling Orochimaru about it. Hah. Have a fun time suffering, bastard.

And just when I was wondering where to go, I met a few Konoha ANBUs, and they decided to grab me back to Konoha. Apparantly, my four year stint at Otogakure didn't really help. Just a mere team of four ANBUs and I am knocked out. You suck, Orochimaru.

And the next thing I know, I am back in Konoha, with Sakura fretting around me and the newest Hokage breathing down my neck in an annoying way. She told me that I am a betrayer to the village and I am supposed to be sentenced to death or life imprisonment.

But that didn't happened to me. The old hag told me that the council is willing to forgive me as long as I repent and provide my services once again to the village.

Forgive me my ass. Even if the council lets me off, that stupid old woman is still suspicious of me. There are four ANBUs monitoring my every movement and I am not even allowed to leave the village. That woman won't even tell me when I could.

Damn it.

current mood: aggravated

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